F*ck F*ck F*ck

I'm so mad at my self I could pull my hair out!
Stupid - stupid me, loosing my control this weekend.

First on Friday - which however I could survive as it was a most peculiar day. Spent the entire day at the hospital. First not able to eat a tiny bit until 10am. Could have worked - had I been able to have my morning coffee. But nooo! No coffee - jeeez not even stupid water!

The result... When I finally could eat I was starving.
And of course "breakfast" was served in the cafeteria...? Skinny milk? NO! Low fat margarine? NO! Whole rye bread? NO!!! Yogurt without added sugar? NOOOO!!!
Jeez you would think it would be easy to find healthy food at a frigging hospital!!!

F*cking white bread, salami, fatty cheese, butter, regular milk, even the bread that looked healthy was just stupid white bread with f*cking dark color!!! Not one single whole grain in it.

So let's just say I had enough calories to last me a whole day.

Then I had to fast again.... Wouldn't have been a problem had I gotten wholegrain bread that would have kept me "NOT HUNGRY" for more than half an hour...

And to top the stupid day at the hospital of... They had to give me a sugar rush to measure my blood sugar and hearth rate with and with out sugar. I have no idea how many calories was in that drink they gave me, but tasted like pure dextrose. And I was still freaking hungry!!

Finally got to finish the day with a heavenly slice of rye bread with minced meat. Lots of protein, fiber and goodies and almost no fat. God I needed that.

Well - I said my Friday was crappy. Saturday just beet Friday down the drain... 

Started as normal with my very Skinny Latte and as I was going to be out all day added a slice of whole grain rye bread to keep me going. After being out and about for 4-5 hours we ended up at a pizzeria...
God help me. You can eat and eat and stuff your face with one calorie bomb after another - and you still don't get sat. I hereby declare pizza the absolutely worse type of calorie bomb food ever!!!!
Two pieces and six-hundred-and-fucking-fifty-eight calories... Felt like throwing up afterwords

And of course had to pop by Starbucks and get a cappuccino and the finish the night with Tacos. At that point I was so low and fed up I ate a bag of nacho chips and he small chocolates!

So! Now I'm done with that!!!!

So glad it's Monday and I'm back at work with my water bottle, my diet pills and that's it.